What did I find out this New Year's? Henry officially labeled me as his "girlfriend". It's kind of a strange twist of events. I say this because every time I have doubts about what I am to him - it conveniently comes up in conversation. I must be living right.
How did it happen? I went to visit Henry at his work (he works at a hotel at night) on New Year's Eve. A family that he knows pretty well was staying and they came down to the lobby and talked to us. During the course of the conversation the wife asked Henry if he had a girlfriend. I started laughing (nerves and just funny). Henry smiled and looked at me like Yeah! She's right there. The wife then said - Oh my gosh you're his girlfriend. You're so cute. Thanks...awkward pause. Then she said isn't Henry great. He's so adorable. I really started laughing now. Henry doesn't love that fact that ladies think he is adorable. I love it. I said, he is adorable. I like that he is adorable. I love that word when used to describe people.
I also established that Henry isn't dating anyone but me. These are all good things. Now my question is: Why hasn't he kissed me yet? I know now that I am ready for him to lay one on me. I am trying to figure out how to subtly let him know that I would like a kiss. We've dated for a while now and if I am his "girlfriend" then what's the hold up. I've gotten to meet some of his family, friends, visited him at work, cooked him dinner, but no kissing.
I don't know if it's because we haven't been very touchy feely. I can be with other guys that don't matter to me, but with him, I totally freeze up. I am practicing the kissing hug. I've asked a few different guys if they would get the message and so far all of them agree. If I do the hug, he will understand. Check back to see if I get brave.
Shirley
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Strike Two
If you remember from a previous post. Bob told me I have three strikes and then he won't call me anymore. I received my second strike the day after Christmas in the form of a text message which I failed to respond to. Is it better just to be the grown up and tell him I'm not interested?
I'm a chicken and guess that I'm not ready to just say the words out loud. I wonder how long he will wait before contacting me again?
Shirley
I'm a chicken and guess that I'm not ready to just say the words out loud. I wonder how long he will wait before contacting me again?
Shirley
Monday, December 28, 2009
Christmas Update
Christmas Eve didn't happen quite as it was supposed to. Henry wasn't able to come, he offered to come Christmas morning, but I thought that might not be a great idea. I knew Christmas morning would be chaotic, which is was.
Instead we made plans for Saturday. I offered to cook him dinner. Thankfully, the dinner went really well. Mostly. You know if I am involved somehow something is going to happen. Henry came bearing gifts. He gave me some really fun presents which were really thoughtful. I have to say that as far as presents go from guys he really did a great job.
The dinner was good, I made him help with the appetizer. We made won tons. When he went to eat the first one, it may have been filled with super hot grease and he may have gotten burned. So sad. I don't know why, but I couldn't think of anything funny, helpful or otherwise conversational to say to him after he burned himself. I just kind of stood there. He said that he was fine. I felt horrible. I apologized and we moved on. Ugh! Why can't I think of things to say. Here let me help you or can I help you. How about watch out for that first bite it's hot. Anything. Even now those are sad attempts.
Luckily for me the rest of the dinner was yummy and went off without anyone getting burned. While I was fixing the rest of dinner, Henry sat down at my piano and played. He asked if I had any song requests. One of the amazing things about Henry is every song I requested from Debbie Gibson, Milli Vanilli, The Cure, Coldplay and The Beatles he can play. He said that he plays by ear. I so envy that talent. It was fun - he's like your own personal jukebox.
After we had finished dinner, Henry received a call from his older Brother. Let's call this brother Matthew (it's getting hard keeping track of all the pseudonyms we have created for people) he has 4 brothers so they will be Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. That way it's easy for me to remember. Matthew was calling because he had tickets to a basketball game and wanted to know if Henry and I wanted to join him and their dad. Henry asked if I was okay with that. He then said that I would probably get an earful about him. I said I was okay - was he?
Henry thought it would be a good idea and a bad idea. The bad idea because he knew his family would quickly be wanting to jump to the marriage topic and good because it would stop his dad from trying to set him up on blind dates.
At the game his dad asked how Henry and I met. I explained we have mutual friends. He said how does that result in meeting? Henry said that several of our mutual friends had told Henry to give me call. They said that I was smart and beautiful and he should get to know me. Thank you kind friends! His dad said Oh, is that how it's done? Yes, dad it is Henry replied. I was then asked what do you do? I explained that I take care of my kids. His dad was super nice about it and said Henry's mom knew all about that. His brother Matthew and I talked about Japan (he lived there and my brief visit.) Meeting his family was fine, it wasn't scary, I was kind of nervous. I think that if I walk in with the mindset that it's like having a business lunch things go much smoother.
During the game, I had to use the bathroom and when I left (according to Henry, who told me later that night) knowing looks were exchanged. His dad and brother gave me the thumbs up approval and Matthew asked Henry if I was "the one". Now when Henry was telling me this I didn't know what to make of it and for some reason I didn't do a great job following up. Why didn't I ask how Henry responded when his family was asking this? I don't know. I wish I had. Probably part of it was fear and part of it was I was freezing standing outside my house. Also, I completely forgot to say thank you again for the awesome Christmas presents.
Let's move to Sunday night. Henry invited me to join him at his friend's house for games and merriment. While there Henry asked me if I knew what ATP stood for - which oddly enough I actually remembered from college. Henry then told me that if his dad knew that I knew what ATP was he would have bought a ring and proposed to me on Henry's behalf. What do these comments mean? Anything or nothing. It was pointed out to me that he could just be making conversation and can joke about these topics or the question was asked is he trying to gauge my reaction? Not really sure. Game night was fun, I like his friends.
Overall, I enjoyed meeting his family, I like his friends and I like Henry. If you were wondering, we haven't kissed, held hands and we barely touch each other. Which is frustrating, good and confusing. I don't know quite what to make of that.
Side note: Kurt gave me some advice today on how to get Henry to kiss me though. He said it's all about the hug. He showed me while we were out running. He made me practice with him (NO - not the kissing part) just the hugging. I kept laughing because I know that I will never be able to actually do this with Henry. It's kind of like my friend's advice on the lingering. It's about arm placement (around their waist), pausing, look him in the eye (just for a few seconds so as not to make them uncomfortable) and I quote "if he's not stupid he will get the point". What is the point - well, you have just given him the green light to move in for a kiss. I guess I could go the less obvious route and just dangle mistletoe. Hahaha! Either way - I have a feeling that 2009 is going to end without a kiss from Henry.
Check back just in case.
Shirley
Instead we made plans for Saturday. I offered to cook him dinner. Thankfully, the dinner went really well. Mostly. You know if I am involved somehow something is going to happen. Henry came bearing gifts. He gave me some really fun presents which were really thoughtful. I have to say that as far as presents go from guys he really did a great job.
The dinner was good, I made him help with the appetizer. We made won tons. When he went to eat the first one, it may have been filled with super hot grease and he may have gotten burned. So sad. I don't know why, but I couldn't think of anything funny, helpful or otherwise conversational to say to him after he burned himself. I just kind of stood there. He said that he was fine. I felt horrible. I apologized and we moved on. Ugh! Why can't I think of things to say. Here let me help you or can I help you. How about watch out for that first bite it's hot. Anything. Even now those are sad attempts.
Luckily for me the rest of the dinner was yummy and went off without anyone getting burned. While I was fixing the rest of dinner, Henry sat down at my piano and played. He asked if I had any song requests. One of the amazing things about Henry is every song I requested from Debbie Gibson, Milli Vanilli, The Cure, Coldplay and The Beatles he can play. He said that he plays by ear. I so envy that talent. It was fun - he's like your own personal jukebox.
After we had finished dinner, Henry received a call from his older Brother. Let's call this brother Matthew (it's getting hard keeping track of all the pseudonyms we have created for people) he has 4 brothers so they will be Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. That way it's easy for me to remember. Matthew was calling because he had tickets to a basketball game and wanted to know if Henry and I wanted to join him and their dad. Henry asked if I was okay with that. He then said that I would probably get an earful about him. I said I was okay - was he?
Henry thought it would be a good idea and a bad idea. The bad idea because he knew his family would quickly be wanting to jump to the marriage topic and good because it would stop his dad from trying to set him up on blind dates.
At the game his dad asked how Henry and I met. I explained we have mutual friends. He said how does that result in meeting? Henry said that several of our mutual friends had told Henry to give me call. They said that I was smart and beautiful and he should get to know me. Thank you kind friends! His dad said Oh, is that how it's done? Yes, dad it is Henry replied. I was then asked what do you do? I explained that I take care of my kids. His dad was super nice about it and said Henry's mom knew all about that. His brother Matthew and I talked about Japan (he lived there and my brief visit.) Meeting his family was fine, it wasn't scary, I was kind of nervous. I think that if I walk in with the mindset that it's like having a business lunch things go much smoother.
During the game, I had to use the bathroom and when I left (according to Henry, who told me later that night) knowing looks were exchanged. His dad and brother gave me the thumbs up approval and Matthew asked Henry if I was "the one". Now when Henry was telling me this I didn't know what to make of it and for some reason I didn't do a great job following up. Why didn't I ask how Henry responded when his family was asking this? I don't know. I wish I had. Probably part of it was fear and part of it was I was freezing standing outside my house. Also, I completely forgot to say thank you again for the awesome Christmas presents.
Let's move to Sunday night. Henry invited me to join him at his friend's house for games and merriment. While there Henry asked me if I knew what ATP stood for - which oddly enough I actually remembered from college. Henry then told me that if his dad knew that I knew what ATP was he would have bought a ring and proposed to me on Henry's behalf. What do these comments mean? Anything or nothing. It was pointed out to me that he could just be making conversation and can joke about these topics or the question was asked is he trying to gauge my reaction? Not really sure. Game night was fun, I like his friends.
Overall, I enjoyed meeting his family, I like his friends and I like Henry. If you were wondering, we haven't kissed, held hands and we barely touch each other. Which is frustrating, good and confusing. I don't know quite what to make of that.
Side note: Kurt gave me some advice today on how to get Henry to kiss me though. He said it's all about the hug. He showed me while we were out running. He made me practice with him (NO - not the kissing part) just the hugging. I kept laughing because I know that I will never be able to actually do this with Henry. It's kind of like my friend's advice on the lingering. It's about arm placement (around their waist), pausing, look him in the eye (just for a few seconds so as not to make them uncomfortable) and I quote "if he's not stupid he will get the point". What is the point - well, you have just given him the green light to move in for a kiss. I guess I could go the less obvious route and just dangle mistletoe. Hahaha! Either way - I have a feeling that 2009 is going to end without a kiss from Henry.
Check back just in case.
Shirley
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
The Nutcracker
Tonight I went to the Nutcracker with Henry. The ballet was awesome, Henry stayed awake and he wore something other than a pair of khaki cargos and black shirt. He actually did look good and I should have complimented him, but feel uncomfortable saying he looks nice. When I do things like that I think it comes out sarcastically or really awkwardly. I need to practice.
What I didn't realize was BYU was playing in their bowl game tonight. Apparently he is a fan and he totally missed it to go to the Nutcracker. He did check the score (via the iphone) during the intermission.
We planned on going to dinner after the ballet. The restaurant was right across the street, it was snowy, my shoes didn't have a lot of traction (do you see where I am going?). We were making our way across the street, I was slipping and sliding all over the place. Good thing I was holding onto Henry. There was a few close calls, but luckily he kept me up. I made a comment about being clumsy referring to the other night and the falling off of the stage. He said that I was sliding very gracefully. Which may or may not have been true.
During dinner we had a great conversation about my life and how it has changed and about our Mom's both having died. He prefaced the conversation by saying, I have a question for you, but you don't have to answer if you don't want to. He then asked me what I think I have learned. We talked quite a bit. It was pointed out that our lives aren't what you would call "typical" or "normal". Why? If I had a typical life I would still be married and he would be married with his 2.5 kids and a dog. We both agreed - thank goodness for being different.
Overall, it was a great night. I loved the ballet, the company and the conversation was exactly what I needed to feel better about this strange "dating" that we are doing. One last thing of note. I did get Henry a funny Christmas present, which he loved, he said that he had something for me, but wanted to come over on Christmas Eve to give it to me. Can I say that I am totally looking forward to Christmas Eve.
Be sure to check back.
Shirley
What I didn't realize was BYU was playing in their bowl game tonight. Apparently he is a fan and he totally missed it to go to the Nutcracker. He did check the score (via the iphone) during the intermission.
We planned on going to dinner after the ballet. The restaurant was right across the street, it was snowy, my shoes didn't have a lot of traction (do you see where I am going?). We were making our way across the street, I was slipping and sliding all over the place. Good thing I was holding onto Henry. There was a few close calls, but luckily he kept me up. I made a comment about being clumsy referring to the other night and the falling off of the stage. He said that I was sliding very gracefully. Which may or may not have been true.
During dinner we had a great conversation about my life and how it has changed and about our Mom's both having died. He prefaced the conversation by saying, I have a question for you, but you don't have to answer if you don't want to. He then asked me what I think I have learned. We talked quite a bit. It was pointed out that our lives aren't what you would call "typical" or "normal". Why? If I had a typical life I would still be married and he would be married with his 2.5 kids and a dog. We both agreed - thank goodness for being different.
Overall, it was a great night. I loved the ballet, the company and the conversation was exactly what I needed to feel better about this strange "dating" that we are doing. One last thing of note. I did get Henry a funny Christmas present, which he loved, he said that he had something for me, but wanted to come over on Christmas Eve to give it to me. Can I say that I am totally looking forward to Christmas Eve.
Be sure to check back.
Shirley
Monday, December 21, 2009
FaceBook Emails
I'm not sure why I always get the interesting emails on FB from random people. This one isn't necessarily bad (at least he didn't mention me rescuing him), but it is definitely not the way I want to meet people. Am I wrong? For some reason I just don't trust getting to know someone online if I don't have opportunity to also meet them in person (i.e. Bob). You can say anything you want regardless of the truth. He does look fairly normal in his pic, but again - I don't trust it. Besides, where would we meet for dinner...Chicago?
"Hi Laverne. I am Jim, I am just looking around FB @ LDS people. I am a HP in the Toronto ON Stake, 14 years in the church, single dad, active with a recommend. I make the Gospel an important part of my life. Looking for new friends in other places. Feel free to chat with me if you like, otherwise, it was nice meeting you, and I hope the spirit of Christmas is with you this season. :D."
Laverne
"Hi Laverne. I am Jim, I am just looking around FB @ LDS people. I am a HP in the Toronto ON Stake, 14 years in the church, single dad, active with a recommend. I make the Gospel an important part of my life. Looking for new friends in other places. Feel free to chat with me if you like, otherwise, it was nice meeting you, and I hope the spirit of Christmas is with you this season. :D."
Laverne
Progressive Emails
Like many of you, I've just been enjoying Shirley's crazy adventures with Henry these past couple of weeks and have forgotten to jump in with updates. Also, because there hasn't been anything too pivotal in recent happenings, I wasn't quite sure what to throw out. Chuck is still Chuck, and I am enjoying getting to know him as we hang out. I may do a post on my current thoughts with him and go into a little more detail - but let's just say I keep hopping the fence on this one.
Also during these past couple of weeks I've been emailing Bob and getting to know more about him. The conversation has been very light, a bit repetitive, but fun. At least he has a better sense of humor than Scott in this arena.
Bob has been busy during this time because of a play he was performing in. This is why he was unable to join our dinner group for December as originally planned. However, he emailed today to say that his winter break started (he's a teacher) and now that the play is over we should "hit a movie, go see some lights, or something."
I'll let you know if that "something" happens.
Laverne
Also during these past couple of weeks I've been emailing Bob and getting to know more about him. The conversation has been very light, a bit repetitive, but fun. At least he has a better sense of humor than Scott in this arena.
Bob has been busy during this time because of a play he was performing in. This is why he was unable to join our dinner group for December as originally planned. However, he emailed today to say that his winter break started (he's a teacher) and now that the play is over we should "hit a movie, go see some lights, or something."
I'll let you know if that "something" happens.
Laverne
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Christmas Concert Fall
Tonight was the Christmas concert with Henry. The concert was fun and festive. Before it began we were back stage (Henry performed as well), he was doing a sound check and I was waiting for him. I needed to go meet a friend of mine and for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to jump off the stage. This isn't going to end well right? The other alternative was to walk along the front of the stage to the other side and go down the stairs. I obviously gave myself more credit than I deserve for being graceful. I went to jump down and my heel got caught in something and I almost (thank goodness) almost landed on my face. Somehow, my cat like reflexes kicked in and I saved myself and landed on my feet (very awkwardly). Did I mention that all the performers of the night were on the stage at the time, watching me and my horribly clumsy moment? Does anyone else feel embarrassed or is it just me? Are you one of those people who avert their eyes when someone is getting embarrassed. I am. I want to look away right now! I really wanted the floor to open up and just swallow me. Henry asked if I was okay. There were several jokes made and I said that's why my mom put me in dancing. Just call me Grace.
I quickly made my exit, shaking my head as I went. Outside I found a girl I had met back in May that knows Henry. I saw her on my date on Tuesday night with Henry and she and I were talking she said by the way - you are dating Henry. What? Apparently she asked him if he and I were dating. He said yes, that he was taking it slow because I am recently divorced, etc. Take home message - we are taking it slow and we are dating.
Great - so now what? Nutcracker on Tuesday. Check back to follow all my awesome moments of awkwardness!
Shirley
I quickly made my exit, shaking my head as I went. Outside I found a girl I had met back in May that knows Henry. I saw her on my date on Tuesday night with Henry and she and I were talking she said by the way - you are dating Henry. What? Apparently she asked him if he and I were dating. He said yes, that he was taking it slow because I am recently divorced, etc. Take home message - we are taking it slow and we are dating.
Great - so now what? Nutcracker on Tuesday. Check back to follow all my awesome moments of awkwardness!
Shirley
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