Something to Help Ease the Pain

Saturday was no fun. I'm not gonna lie there were tears shed - lots in fact and not much sleeping. Sunday was a day of healing. Still hard, more tears, but I was able to receive a blessing from a great friend's husband. Laverne cooked me dinner (which was yummy) and I was able to process this horrible weekend.

A few things that helped me besides the above mentioned. First, I ran into an old friend from college. As luck would have it, one that I had just been talking about with a good friend. So college guy and I had many of the same classes and even hung out a little. He asked all the awkward questions within the first five minutes of seeing him. You know, job - don't have one, marriage - divorced, family - dead, etc. It was funny and I'm glad I can laugh about it. It was just nice to see him.

Second, on my drive to Laverne's Sunday night, I pulled up along side a car and look over and who do I see, but George he waved and I waved back. For some reason that small and simple thing made me feel like I would be ok. It's so funny to me that at three different times in my life when I most needed something (something that I couldn't clearly define for myself) George calls (on the way home from Washington), asks me out on my first date, or pulls up next to me. I love it.

If you remember he was my first date and it was completely awkward and hilarious. We never went out again, I haven't even seen him since our date. It's been a year and it was like a little sign that everything would be ok for me. George doesn't even know that he has been that guy for me. So to George: thank you! I just thought that needed to be said and thrown out there.

Third, I wrote a letter to Henry. I had more things that I needed to say. I needed a moment away from the situation to think about it and then respond. The email was so therapeutic. I didn't send it, I don't need to. It wasn't mean. It was just something I needed to say. It feels good to be able to say what you want and let it go.

So for now - I have officially survived the first year of my divorce. I have discovered the crazy world of dating, had the opportunity to date a really great guy, have a few memorable kisses, kind of get my heart broken, reconnect with old friends, make new friends, have some really embarrassing moments, and amazingly still feel at peace with my life. It's not perfect, it's not what I thought it would be, but it's mine. I am looking forward to this next year and all the fun it brings.

Shirley